What to Do Before "I DO"
A Life-Changing SELF-PACED ONLINE Pre-Marital Course that puts couples on the path to Marriage for a lifetime not just the wedding, a moment in time.
From the table of Amaka Chika-Mbonu, a certified counsellor, a pre-marital expert, and a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist. She has over 25 years of experience guiding couples. She is the founder of Amaka's Book Club (marriage/relationships focused) and the author of seven books. She empowers individuals with her wisdom gained through training and experience. Amaka has been married for thirty-two years and has two adult children
Most Couples Are Planning FOR A Wedding, Not A Marriage
A proposal has been made and accepted. A flurry of activity ensues, venue ideas, dress designs, and flower arrangements.
But in the whirlwind of wedding planning, there's a critical question being overlooked:
Are you preparing for your wedding day, or for the ’lifetime’ that follows?
The alarming reality is that most couples invest months and millions planning a single day, while spending virtually no time preparing for their actual marriage.
Consider these sobering statistics:
- 40-50% of first marriages end in divorce.
- This jumps to 60-70% for second, third, or fourth marriages or beyond.
- Two-thirds of separations happen within the first ten years.
- Even religious couples aren't immune, Evangelicals have above-average divorce rates according to the Council on Contemporary Families
Every couple getting married believes that they will be different. That they are the exception.
Yet the numbers don't lie. Without proper preparation, your marriage faces the same statistical challenges as everyone else's.
The Cost of Being Unprepared Is Devastating
When marriages fail, the consequences extend far beyond heartbreak:
Even marriages that don't end in divorce often settle into painful patterns of:
The most tragic part? Many of these failures could have been prevented with proper preparation.
What Happens When You Skip Premarital Preparation:
Without these foundations, many couples find themselves utterly unprepared for the real challenges of marriage.
They're building their relationship on sand rather than on solid ground.
But it doesn't have to be this way.
Transform Your Marriage Before It Even Begins
“Marriage takes work to make it work, so we need to get to work. The truth is that marriage only works if you work it”
– Amaka Chika-Mbonu
Introducing:
What to Do Before 'I DO
(The comprehensive 10-module premarital course created by renowned Marriage and Pre-Marital Counselor, Cognitive Behavioral Therapist, Author, and Speaker, Amaka Chika-Mbonu)
This isn't just another generic marriage preparation program. This is the culmination of decades working with hundreds of couples, seeing firsthand what makes marriages thrive and what causes them to crumble.
The research is clear: Couples who invest in comprehensive premarital programs have a 30-31% higher chance of remaining happily married.
That's not just a statistic, it's a lifeline.
Why This Course Stands Apart
While other premarital courses might offer surface-level advice, "What to Do Before 'I DO'" is a robust and comprehensive course that dives deep into the 10 critical areas that relationship experts know determine marital success:
Module 1: READY, SET, GO - Preparation for your wedding
A form to help you track and tick off what you have done and what you have yet to do.
Module 2: TALK TO ME…or DON’T - Communication
- A questionnaire that you can answer to help you determine your communication style.
- An example of a statement phrased in the four different communication styles, to help you understand why a particular style is best
Module 3: RESOLVE TO RESOLVE - Conflict Resolution
A sample of a ‘Pledge Form’ that you can adapt to suit your particular needs and the dynamic and history of your relationship. This form will enshrine what you have both decided about how you will deal with conflict in your marriage
Module 4: NEED - Meeting each other's needs
- A Needs vs Wants Chart
- A colourful and visual pictorial of men and women’s needs
Module 5: THE CORE - Alignment
A questionnaire to aid you in discovering what your core beliefs and values are. This will enable the two of you to discuss them with each other.
Module 6: THE VOW - What exactly are we pledging to do?
A handout that documents the three kinds of vows we discuss in this module, crafted, secular and traditional
Module 7: ROLE PLAY - Who does what?
Two pictorial handouts to encapsulate two things, then go on to compare and discuss them with each other:
- What do I believe is my role as a husband/wife?
- What is my expectation of you as a husband/wife?
Module 8: LET’s TALK ABOUT SEX - Physical Intimacy
A handout containing over twenty questions under different categories titled, ‘Guidelines for Discussions about Sex for Pre-marital couples’
Module 9: SHOW ME THE MONEY - Finance and Money Matters
- A Budget Form
- An Expense Tracker
- A Savings Goal Form
- Two pictorials with images depicting the 70/20/10 rule for finance
Module 10: THE LAW OF IN-LAWS - Relationship with Parents and In-laws
A form with nineteen questions you can ask your spouse to be to discover how their experience with their parents, your potential in-laws might have an impact on your marriage
The True Cost Comparison
Which costs more?
This program: A ONE-TIME INVESTMENT less than most couples spend on wedding flowers, catering, bridal showers, and attire.
Divorce: Average cost ₦1,500,000-₦3,000,000, conservatively (in Nigeria, in other countries it can be significantly higher depending on the complexities of the case). This plus incalculable emotional damage, to all concerned
Unhappy marriage: Years or decades of conflict, resentment, toxicity, and unfulfilled expectations, which have the potential to impact general wellbeing and peace of mind which can affect physical health. And also wreak havoc on productivity, creativity and innovative spirit in the workplace.
For less than 1% of the average wedding budget, you can significantly increase your chances of a marriage that actually thrives.
My Personal Promise to You
As a marriage counselor who has worked with hundreds of couples: from newlyweds to those celebrating golden anniversaries, I've designed this course to provide what I wish every couple had and knew before saying "I do."
This isn't about creating perfect marriages, those don't exist. This is about building an unshakable foundation that can weather life's inevitable storms and grow stronger through the challenges.
I've seen too many couples enter marriage blind to the realities they'll face. I've comforted too many who wished they'd had these conversations before exchanging vows.
Don't become another statistic. Don't gamble with the most important relationship of your life, whose failure will affect every single other area of your life.
This is a SELF-PACED ONLINE COURSE and is your opportunity to build the marriage you've always dreamed of, one that doesn't just survive, but truly thrives.
Still Not Convinced? Ask Yourself:
If you answered "NO" to even one of these questions, THEN, you need this program. Don't wait until problems arise to seek solutions. Prevent them now.
"Marriage requires a certain skill set. DO NOT let anyone convince you otherwise. The way your marriage begun is the way it is likely to run. It is really quite literally the cliche, ‘as you make your bed, so will you lie in it’"
– Amaka Chika-Mbonu
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Even couples who have been together for decades discover new things about each other through this course. Long-term dating relationships operate differently than marriages, especially regarding finances, family boundaries, and lifestyle expectations.
Many of our most surprised participants are couples who thought they "knew everything" about each other, only to discover crucial conversations they'd never had. Think of it this way: you wouldn't skip insurance on a valuable investment just because it's been reliable so far.
Absolutely not! This course is preventative, not remedial. The strongest marriages start with proper preparation. Think of it like servicing a car before a cross-country journey rather than waiting for a breakdown on the highway.
Our most successful participants are often the couples with the healthiest relationships who want to ensure they stay that way. Remember: it's easier to build a strong foundation than to repair a cracked one.
Consider this: the average couple spends ₦10,000,000+ conservatively (this may be more in other currencies depending on the scale of the wedding, whatever the case weddings are not cheap) on a single day (the wedding) while investing nothing in preparation for the ‘lifetime’ of years to follow.
Our course costs less than most couples spend on flowers or photography. More importantly, divorce costs an average of ₦1,500,000-₦3,000,000, conservatively (in Nigeria, in other countries it can be significantly higher depending on the complexities of the case) not counting the emotional toll. Participants consistently tell us that this course was the best money they spent in their entire wedding budget because it actually protects their marriage investment.
Religious premarital counseling is valuable but sometimes limited in scope and depth. Our 10-module program goes significantly deeper into critical areas like financial management, conflict resolution, intimacy expectations, and family boundaries.
We provide concrete tools, assessments, and resources for each area, not just advice. Many religious leaders actually recommend our course as a complement to their counseling because we address practical issues they may not have the time, nor indeed the specific training to explore fully.
Even couples with strong communication benefit enormously from our structured approach. This course doesn't just address how you communicate, but what you haven't yet communicated about. Many participants who "rarely fight" discover it's because they've been avoiding important topics altogether!
Our modules ensure you discuss every critical area before marriage, not just the ones that naturally come up. Plus, the conflict resolution tools we teach aren't just for arguments, they're skills that enhance your connection even when things are going well.
© Amaka Chika-Mbonu. All rights Reserved I Disclaimer